It is important to realize that yes, there is help, but we need to consider several points. First, when a person is responding with true rage, it is more than likely due to a past wound or sore spot that has been disturbed. Like any fresh wound, the more you scratch and disturb that wound, the more it will bleed. Anger Therapists frequently look for ways to identify “trigger mechanisms” - experiences or responses that stimulate raw, hurtful areas of one's personality resulting in extreme, often violent, reactions. When a person is beginning to experience these hurts, they need to remember they DO HAVE A CHOICE! Anger responses don’t necessarily have to lead to automatic reactions. No one “makes” us angry. Rather, it is persons practiced response to that trigger mechanism that leads to rage. Just as the response was “learned “ it can be UN-learned. It means choosing to adopt a peace of mind attitude instead of one of conflict and discontent that lead to rage response. Many people are familiar with the term “reciprocal thinking”. For people who wrestle with anger management this refers to that inner dialogue voice that erroneously plays over and over causing the rising anger response. It is the thoughts and reactions one hears on the inside while the anger scenario develops. One can sit and “stew” and play the dialogue over and over in ones head allowing the raw, sore wounds to eventually trigger a violent outburst OR a person can take the initiative to “re-program” the dialogue and practice “re-writing the script”. It takes a little effort but you are looking for an alternative way to deal with the situation. This means replacing the old, negative, aggressive, fault finding voice with one that is more understanding. One that is less conformational and more empathetic to the other person. In so doing you replace the old dialogue with one that helps AVOID escalation rather than promote it. It all comes down to the critical element of choice. Which response will YOU choose?